Your Retirement Living Connection

By Medical News TODAY

Seniors who become adept at and use a computer appear to have fewer depressive symptoms than those older adults who aren't so technologically connected.

That's the finding of a research study, Depression and Social Support Among Older Adult Computer Users, presented August 18 at the 113th Annual Convention of the American Psychological Association.

The data regarding computer use and depressive symptoms was collected as part of the latest wave of an ongoing longitudinal study that is designed to determine the changes over time in physical health, mental health and social activity of older adults living in lower Manhattan.

Called VOICES (Villagers Over 65 Independent Living Challenges and Expectations), the research is being sponsored by Village Care of New York, a not-for-profit long-term care provider. “Villagers” refers to persons living in Manhattan's Greenwich Village and environs, representing the core group of individuals being followed over the course of the study, which began in 1998.

By Jacqueline Marcell, National Speaker & Author of “Elder Rage”

We’ve all heard about the power of positive thinking, which is real easy to do when things are going well–but quite another when everything is hitting the fan. When I was going through the worst time of my life caring for my sweet but ailing mother and challenging elderly father, I remember people telling me that I had to remain positive. It made me pretty angry, because it was so easy for them to say, a monumental task to do, and I really wanted them to be in my shoes and try it!

And what was there to be positive about anyway? I was watching my once-competent parents decline and go through surgery after surgery, and having my father scream obscenities at me, throw me out of the house, and even try to choke me to death. I cried rivers daily and pleaded for help from an unsympathetic medical system that just wasn’t helping me appropriately.

I became overwhelmed emotionally, physically, financially, and often felt that I was dangerously close to going over the edge. What pulled me back every time was finding some humor–somewhere, somehow–and forcing myself to read over my list of "Gratitudes" to change my mindset.

By Roderick R. Barnes

In the past twenty years, the range of retirement living and long term care options for senior citizens has expanded along with the elderly population. With an eye on senior citizens’ preferences and their pocket books, the geriatric care industry now offers a rich continuum of care facilities and services, from in-home assistance, to assisted living centers, to hospice homes.

As so often happens, the innovations of the marketplace have outrun government legislatures and regulators. It is no wonder that there exist gaps in the regulatory framework governing the industry. But consumers should be aware of these gaps, one of the most conspicuous of which in some states concerns “independent living” facilities.

A relative newcomer to the industry, the independent living home or community evolved from the “assisted living” model. Assisted living options are tailored for seniors who need help with daily activities like eating or being fed, grooming, bathing, dressing, and mobility. Such homes do provide residents a modicum of independence, but they are really for very frail or infirm people who cannot survive on their own.

Thus, seniors with active lifestyles and relatively good health are often averse to the assisted living options available. They may be frail, may need assistance now and then, but on the whole they can eat, dress, bathe, and get around on their own. They are mentally sharp, but due to their age are looking to downsize to a single level, low maintenance living environment.

By Your Life (YL) Magazine

An Interview with Clinical Psychologist and Family Therapist - Dr. Miriam Tisher

When a marriage ends, there can be repercussions, for the whole family. Your Life spoke with clinical psychologist and family therapist Dr. Miriam Tisher about the relationships between grandparents, parents, and grandchildren.

YL: We hear stories about grandparents being estranged from their grandchildren when a marriage ends. Is this common?

Miriam Tisher: I don’t see it commonly in my practice. I take it we’re talking about an acrimonious ending, which is a particular form of a relationship break-up. The important question to me is: What does it all mean? What would make a parent want to cut the relationship between the children and their grandparents? It’s probably a fair bet to say the hurt of the parent is running this.

He or she must be hurting very substantially.

Let’s speculate on the feelings of the parent in that situation [acrimonious ending of a marriage]. There will probably be anger, fear, and maybe shame.

If you’re a parent in that situation, and you cut the relationship between your children and their grandparents, maybe you think it will put pressure on your partner.

You may not want your parents-inlaw to see their grandchildren. You may feel they won’t approve, or may influence the children to side with the other parent.